NFR Humor (No political jokes)

Non-fishing related
There's an old widower who owns a bed & breakfast on the shores of a beautiful lake. One day, a newlywed couple on their honeymoon checks in. The bride is breathtakingly gorgeous and is all over the groom like a wet shirt. He gives the couple the key to their room and wishes them a happy honeymoon. "Won't be seeing too much of them, I reckon" he thinks to himself with a smile.

About 10 minutes pass and the groom comes down the stairs, goes out the front door, goes to his car, and gathers up a bunch of fishing equipment and tackle. He then immediately goes to the dock and begins fishing. He stays out there until well after dark.

The next morning, after breakfast, the groom does exactly the same thing. This repeats the next two mornings.

On the 4th morning, as the guy is gathering up his fishing tackle, the innkeeper approaches him and says "this is none of my business, but I can't help but notice that you've been spending the majority of your time on your honeymoon fishing by yourself. If you don't mind me saying, your new bride is a knockout and she seems to really want your company, if you catch my drift. Why aren't you upstairs in your room making passionate hot love to her?".

Without missing a beat, the groom says "well, yeah...about that...you see, she's got a raging case of gonorrhea".

"Oof, wow!" says the old fella. "But...What about the other place down south you could put it?".

"Thats no good either. She has chronic diarrhea".

"Hmmm...well...what about a nice BJ?".

"She has really bad canker sores, gum disease, and halitosis".

"Christ, man. Why did you marry her in the first place, then?!"

"She has worms too, and i just love to fish".
 
Some things to ponder as we get older:



The inventor of the treadmill died at the age of 54

The inventor of gymnastics died at the age of 57

The world bodybuilding champion died at the age of 41

The best soccer player in the world, Maradona, died at the age of 60

And then..

KFC inventor died at 94

Inventor of Nutella brand died at the age of 88

Cigarette maker Winston died at the age of 102

The inventor of opium died at the age of 116 in an earthquake

Hennessy cognac, Irish inventor died at 98

How did doctors come to the conclusion that exercise prolongs life?



The rabbit is always jumping, but it lives for only 2 years. The turtle that doesn't exercise at all, lives 400 years.



So ... Have a drink ... Take a nap ...And when you wake up, have some ice cream and cake!
Please hot peach cobbler with ice cream think you.
 
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