NFR Humor (No political jokes)

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[mark wlker]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[DanielOcean]

 

[Mukman]

Two old men are sitting at a bar. One says to the other, “Did you know that lions have sex 10 to 15 times a day?”

His buddy said, “Aw feck. I just joined the Rotary.”

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

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Now a conservation of momentum issue
Which one of the kids will have learning disabilities as they ageand psychological trauma of the

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now the question is which cild will most likely feel the effects of victim mentality as they mature?its not the first one being grabbed by the big scary teacher with creepy glasses

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Zak]

“I won’t say anything without my lawyer present.”

“But sir, you are the lawyer”

“Exactly, where’s my present?”

 

[Stonedfish]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

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Decorated with one chocolate chip.

 

[bobduck]

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What? No chocolate chips?

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Mukman]

My wife told me I’ve grown as a person.

Her actual words were “You’ve gotten fat”, but I know what she meant.

 

[Mossback]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Mukman]

A woman had a husband who enjoyed his drink too much had finally had enough, and told him that if he came home drunk again, she was leaving him.

After a while, the husband went to the pub and really tied one on, and puked all over himself. As he sat there dreading to go home, his buddy said, “Don’t worry, just tell the missus that someone threw up on you. Put a $20 in your pocket and say it’s from the guy for the cleaning bill.” Husband thinks this is genius and heads home.

Wife is clearly upset, until he tells her the story, and shows her the $20.

She then asks, “OK, but you have two 20’s. What’s the other one for?”

He replies, “That’s from the guy who shat in my pants.”