Strange, Weird, Funny Border crossings

[Scott Salzer]

I had to travel to Canada for business. I had a guy from Italy and CA with me. Coming back, I picked up two bottles of 222’s aspirin with coedine. When asked by US customs if I was bringing anything back, I told him what I had. Why two bottles? That is what the pharmacy said was good. I also mentioned I was bringing a bottle for a friend, oops. So, you are transporting a controlled substance across an international border. Pull over and go into that building. While standing in line, a dog just happened to go between me and my companions. I’d been sniffed. A few $ ‘s changed hands but us customs said they hoped I wasn’t stopped on the way home.
When going to Canada, don’t bring anything back, except visions of some effing big fish.

 

[Scott Salzer]

Shawn, pretty! That is the 2024 post of the year and it is only 01/19.

My very best to all of you, a your families in 2024.

Take care and be safe.

 

[SurfnFish]

The Orange Sunshine was just starting to take effect.. walked me into a building and sat me down at a desk about 10 feet from a holding cell full of Mexican nationals who started yelling to put the “Rubio pollo” (blonde chicken) in with them.

friggin hilarious...lol

 

[_WW_]

Some great stories!

I don't always have weird encounters but here's another one.

I was crossing in the fall for some steelhead fishing and it was after I had recently acquired my concealed carry permit. I roll up to the booth as the guy is checking his computer screen.
"Where are you going?"
"Up to the Skeena River to do some fishing."
"Do you have any weapons?"
"No."
"Are there any guns in your truck?"
"No."
"Do you keep your guns in the trailer?"
"No."
"Where are your guns?"
"Locked up at home like they're supposed to be."
"So you didn't bring any guns with you?"
"No."
"How are you going to protect yourself up there?"
"I don't know."
"Have a nice trip."

Driving away I suddenly had this thought. Is there something going on up there that I should know about?
The smart ass response would have been that I planned on buying a knife and sharpening a stick - but that's how you get turned around.

 

[Jake Watrous]

Don’t do this:

Context: Years ago, with his standing but not that-instance permission I borrowed my friend Guillermo’s truck while he was working for several months down in Mexico. He had a canopy and I wanted to sleep in the truck and fish up in Squamish, BC.

Headed into Canada:

Border security: “Has anyone asked you, or are you, transporting large bags of flour?”

Me: What a weird question. Of course not. “LARGE bags of flour? No.”

Border security: “Any bags of flour?”

Me: “No. Why—Ohhh, you’re thinking of cocaine. Or maybe anthrax. Does anyone ever say ‘yes’?”

Border security: …”Sir, is this your car?”

Me: Ok, I said way to much before, keep it short. "No"

Border Security: "Sir, whose car is this?"

Me: "It's my buddies. He's down in Mexico."

Border Security: "Do you have his permission to be using it?"

Me: "Not really, but I'm sure he's cool with it. Said I could use it as long as I don't mess with his stuff."

Shit, that sounds bad. Make it seem like you really know him.

"You wouldn't believe all the stuff he's got stashed in the glove box, under the seats, etc."

...

An hour later, border security and I came to the agreement that I was (1) too honest for everyone's good, (2) an idiot whose mouth got ahead of his brain, and (3) neither Guillermo or I were breaking any laws of any kind.

 

[Salmo_g]

I was thinking, gee, I've never had any unusual border crossings . . . and then I remembered the time. When I was a fisheries student, two other classmates and I wanted to see the Vancouver aquarium and the government bookstore, where some expensive fisheries books were steeply discounted. The driver had never been to Canada before. He was confused about what to do, and as I began to explain about driving up to the booth, he decided to swerve into the right lane and just floored it. He was almost at freeway speed as sirens were going off all over, and I was yelling, "WTF, slow down!" He claimed that he thought the border control was some building he sighted off in the distance, as I was telling him to reverse his way back to the border control booth. I correctly decided to explain to the border officer that my friend, the driver, was just an idiot who had never before been to a border station. They believed it because, who, besides an actual idiot, would do what he just did.