NFR Humor (No political jokes)

[Mossback]

 

[albula]

I called the wife on my way home from work to see if she wanted me to pick up fish and chips. She just grunted. I think she is still pissed off about letting me name the twins.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Mukman]

The older I get, the more I understand why a rooster wakes up screaming every morning.

 

[Herkileez]

The older I get, the more I understand why a rooster wakes up screaming every morning.

On the plus side of getting older: A lifetime supply of anything doesn't need to be all that much stuff.

 

[_WW_]

On the plus side of getting older: A lifetime supply of anyrhing doesn't need to be all that much stuff.

Then there is always that decision on whether or not to buy green bananas.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Then there is always that decision on whether or not to buy green bananas.

Or that risk of getting out the digging fork.

 

[Herkileez]

Again on the plus side: The older I get... the better I was.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Again on the plus side: The older I get... the better I was.

As long as ya don’t tell everyone about that.

 

[Mukman]

I woke up laughing this morning.

Must have slept funny.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

I woke up laughing this morning.

Must have slept funny.

I woke this morning and my hip hurt, it must be my funny bone.

 

[Mossback]

 

[JudyM]

View attachment 126326

Born with no teef, butt wrapped in a diaper, same as getting old. But there is that time when y'all have to have a colonoscopy,
and let all that air outta the tire before you are able to go home and eat.

 

[bobduck]

Heard on tv........Marriage is like a bong, you have to take few hits to make it work.

 

[Mukman]

Walmart has me putting up my Christmas tree while eating turkey in my Halloween costume.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Walmart has me putting up my Christmas tree while eating turkey in my Halloween costume.

At least they don’t have you eating the Christmas tree in your Halloween turkey costume. Sorry I watched the debate between Michele Obama and Donald the Great.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

At least they don’t have you eating the Christmas tree in your Halloween turkey costume. Sorry I watched the debate between Michele Obama and Donald the Great.

Yes I was stretching the humor as one of the participants can’t seem to keep who they are talking to straight.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Best line post debate:

‘She was like a childless cat woman with a laser pointer, and he chased the dot the whole night.’

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Mossback]