NFR Humor (No political jokes)
- Thread starter Buzzy
- Start date
Non-fishing related
wanderingrichard
Life of the Party
I don't think the Germans have anything to do with this
Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange.
When the waiter brought our water and cutlery, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?" "Well, "he explained, "the restaurant’s owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped piece of cutlery. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our staff are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift."
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon, and he was able to replace it with his spare. "I’ll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now." I was impressed.
I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter’s zip on his trousers. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?"
"Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 per cent."
I asked, "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"
"Well," he whispered, "I don’t know about the others, but I use the spoon."
When the waiter brought our water and cutlery, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?" "Well, "he explained, "the restaurant’s owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped piece of cutlery. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our staff are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift."
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon, and he was able to replace it with his spare. "I’ll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now." I was impressed.
I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter’s zip on his trousers. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?"
"Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 per cent."
I asked, "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"
"Well," he whispered, "I don’t know about the others, but I use the spoon."
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
Capt Insano Emeritis
Legend
Cool image but have no idea what it means and thus consequently nor why it is humorous.
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
It is okay. I have similar things happen to me.
Capt Insano Emeritis
Legend
Of course its okay… it is the OMJ influence it hits some of us overnight and we end up just sayin wth and live with it
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
Then I trust at your age, and wisdom you will still sleep soundly tonight sir even though you didnt get the joke. : )
My next fishing rig! Will have to lift it and add pontoons though..
Is that Vin Diesel?
Capt Insano Emeritis
Legend
Okay so in order to get this joke one needs to recognize the guy. Not sure I have ever seen Vin Diesel in anything that I would actually want to sit and watch.
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
@JudyM , @Capt Insano Emeritis . It is an inside joke against the Fast and the Furious Franchise. Vin Diesel has been the lead role since the first movie and now they have made like 15 movies or something so it is taking a playful jab at the fact that the movie franchise refuses to end.
Similarly in the movie Airport, you see this, and it is of similar context.
Similarly in the movie Airport, you see this, and it is of similar context.
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
Brad Williams - John stamos skit 😂😂 #comedyskit #standupcomedians #standupcomedy #mattrife #mattrifecomedy #c#comedian #funnyvideos | Brad Williams fanss | Brad Williams fanss · Original audio
Brad Williams - John stamos skit 😂😂 #comedyskit #standupcomedians #standupcomedy #mattrife #mattrifecomedy #c#comedian #funnyvideos. Brad Williams fanss · Original audio
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Nice to know I wasn't the only one that didn't get it, merci'!
@DanielOcean, Airport? Surely, you can't be serious.@JudyM , @Capt Insano Emeritis . It is an inside joke against the Fast and the Furious Franchise. Vin Diesel has been the lead role since the first movie and now they have made like 15 movies or something so it is taking a playful jab at the fact that the movie franchise refuses to end.
Similarly in the movie Airport, you see this, and it is of similar context.
Image is from Airplane II The Sequel which "almost bombed" and prevented Airplane from becoming a franchise, altogether.
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
I like watching older movies and noticing the stuff that "wouldnt fly" today LOL.
DanielOcean
Fart! : )
I got to only 15 seconds and was sold. LOL shit's terrible 