NFR Humor (No political jokes)

Non-fishing related
Whitney Cummings, responding to the story a paraglider told of getting caught up in a tornado and surviving wind, hail, and freezing temperatures:

"Or.....she just could have said she was running late."
 
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Did not see that coming, nope......

In the hypothetical world... if Yevgeny sat next/near to me on the plane (bus, rail car, cafe, restaurant etc), I am faking some kind of illness and getting the hell out of there ASAP
It used to be that commercial fishing was the most dangerous job. Now it's being a Russian military leader...

They had to resort to this method because he wouldn't leave the ground floor of any buildings.
 
It used to be that commercial fishing was the most dangerous job. Now it's being a Russian military leader...

They had to resort to this method because he wouldn't leave the ground floor of any buildings.

The Russian Milgard knock-off rep, closing a deal:

"These windows (spits) are Russian, high quality, Like Milgard window in United States, but Russian....they have special power....you have enemies, no? Well these windows, your enemies fall through them, your friends (spits), my friends, your kids, my kids, no problem. It's magic window, no?"
 
If you were Yevgeny, and knew time was short, you might just want to disappear and spend a few years toes up on a beach…
 
The only possible hole in my theory (;-) is that everyone on the planet would recognize him.
Apparently he regularly used a decoy plane.
 
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An older gentleman was driving down the highway on his way to Home Depot when his cell phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "George, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on I-90. Please be careful!"

"Hell," said George, "It's not just one car. It's dozens of them!"
 
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