NFR Humor

Non-fishing related

bobduck

Steelhead
Forum Supporter
Just remembered another old limerick:

There once was man from Grants Pass
Whose balls were made out of brass
When they clanged together
They played stormy weather
And lightning shot out of his ass.

We used to sing these when I was on the hot shot crew in the 60's while we were traveling to a fire.
 

Capt Insano Emeritis

Legend
Forum Supporter
I hate the whole automated operator thing. I called my shrink's office earlier and heard this:
If you have an obsessive compulsion disorder please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personality disorder, press 3, 4, 5, and 6 simultaneously.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are. Stay on the line and we'll trace your call.
If you're delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.
If you suffer from schizophrenia listen closely and a small voice will tell you what to press.
If you are depressive it doesn't matter which number you press; nobody will answer you anyway.
If you're dyslexic press 69696969696.
If you have a nervous disorder please press the hatch key until you hear a beep. When you hear the beep please wait for the beep.
If you have short memory loss please try your call again later.
If you have low self esteem hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.
 

Mukman

Life of the Party
The horse and mule live for thirty years
And know nothing of wine and beers
The goat and sheep at twenty die
And know nothing of Scotch or Rye
The cows drink water by the ton
And at eighteen are mostly done
At fifteen the dog cashes in
Without the aid of rum or gin
The cat in milk and water soaks
And then at twelve short years it croaks
The modest stone-dry sober hen
Lays eggs for nogs, then dies at ten
All animals are strictly dry
Sinless live and sinless die
But sinful, gin-ful rum soaked men
Survive for three score years and ten.

Drink up everyone!
 

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