NFR Humor (No political jokes)

[flybill]

 

[Breck]

I like to fart in a roomfull of hipsters and then listen to them argue about which one of them heard it first.

 

[Old406Kid]

The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.


He's currently assembling his cabinet.

Just In...The head of the opposition, Allen, is ready to throw a wrench in his plans

 

[flybill]

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

 

[Breck]

The earth actually used to be flat...until they buried yo mama.

 

[Breck]

"One man's trash is another man's treasure" is a nice sentiment, but it's a terrible way to tell your kids that they're adopted.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Just some time travel back a decade ago…while going for a drive-

went driving today saw a bunch of Hyundamitsabishanagasaki cars out there...remember when little suv's all looked like toasters ...now so many look like darth vader...they are so clever them design wizards

 

[Stonedfish]

 

[flybill]

 

[Breck]

Steven Seagal gets out of breath from taking a breath.

 

[SilverFly]

Deleted. More dumb than funny.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Deleted. More dumb than funny.

Aww darn , just when I was getting used to dumb!

 

[SilverFly]

Aww darn , just when I was getting used to dumb!

Ok, just for you Skip. My wife and I like to watch calming nature stuff before bed. Maybe this was funny because we were exhausted, just have dumb/warped senses of humor. Or how the narrator was oblivious to the double meaning.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Ok, just for you Skip. My wife and I like to watch calming nature stuff before bed. Maybe this was funny because we were exhausted, just have dumb/warped senses of humor.Or how the narrator was oblivious to the double meaning.

View attachment 176957

Now having seen your explanation I am no longer in the mood, Silverfly.

 

[Capt Insano Emeritis]

Sorry, I suppose pining is a bit twisted.

 

[Breck]

There's a maniac in my neighborhood that goes around leaving severed body parts on people's doorsteps.

He gives me the willies.

 

[Ardster]

I've developed a technique for watching football that may be of value to some others here.

My TV is generated via a Fire Cube and we are subscribed to Youtube TV. Here's the trick.

Wait until the kicker is approaching the ball for the opening kickoff.

Now press the pause button.

Wait at least 1/2 hour before resuming the broadcast and turn off your phone.

I found that during some broadcasts there were so many lengthy Drug Commercials that by the time the games had ended I was having side affects. The pause time allows you to avoid this unpleasant part of being a football viewer.

Hope that helps with the Conference Championships because I figure they'll hit it hard during the games

 

[Ardster]

 

[Breck]

Bar patron: "Whiskey, rocks."


Bartender: "Hell yeah it does, brother!"